I must say this holiday season had a diferent feeling to me than last year. I didnt put up a tree till the week before Christmas and I wasnt going to buy anyone a gift.
Then all of a sudden, two nights before christmas I felt the spirit to give. Me and a friend of mine went out on the 24th and shopped with all the other last min shoppers.
I was able to give all of my imediate family a gift and it felt good. Wish I had more to give but the family knows my situation. I felt blessed giving and I was truly blessed with what I recieved. This year I recieved a lot of things I truly needed and wanted. (still no husband under the tree) but Me and Santa are talking about that for next year. :-)
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Sunday, December 12, 2010
I know Ive Been Changed
Things I would deal with I no longer have time for. I know I've been changed and its for the better.
Have you ever noticed how one word, one action or one gesture can change a persons view of how they feel about you? It could be that what you did reminds them of someone or something. Be it good or bad, we should all be careful of our actions and what we say. Especially to those we have an interest in because one little thing can turn them off and change the direction of your friendship or relationship.
Example: I have a male friend that just came out of a situation and I have been a listening ear, a counselor and overall support for this person. Well he said a few things that didn't sit well with me and as a friend I brought it to his attention. He said he understood and wouldn't say it again. The very next day not only did he say the same thing but he added another element to it. After that moment I was totally turned off. I didn't want to talk to him on the phone, hang out with him or listen to his problems anymore.From that, my view of him changed in a negative way.
There was a time when I would have looked over something like that and continue to try and be there for this person. However my recent change and transition with self will not allow me to. Its my choice and I know that the friendship will end up being toxic and block me from getting to where I need to be spiritually.
The same goes with new people I meet. If your intentions are being a potential mate, I now look at how you handle stress, your spending habits and how you take care of your children if you have them. Its amazing how the lord shows us what we want, what we like and what we need. Its up to us to make a good decision and choose wisely. One quote I took from today's church service. "Change when you need to so you don't have to change when you have to." I'm changing to get to my next level.
Have you ever noticed how one word, one action or one gesture can change a persons view of how they feel about you? It could be that what you did reminds them of someone or something. Be it good or bad, we should all be careful of our actions and what we say. Especially to those we have an interest in because one little thing can turn them off and change the direction of your friendship or relationship.
Example: I have a male friend that just came out of a situation and I have been a listening ear, a counselor and overall support for this person. Well he said a few things that didn't sit well with me and as a friend I brought it to his attention. He said he understood and wouldn't say it again. The very next day not only did he say the same thing but he added another element to it. After that moment I was totally turned off. I didn't want to talk to him on the phone, hang out with him or listen to his problems anymore.From that, my view of him changed in a negative way.
There was a time when I would have looked over something like that and continue to try and be there for this person. However my recent change and transition with self will not allow me to. Its my choice and I know that the friendship will end up being toxic and block me from getting to where I need to be spiritually.
The same goes with new people I meet. If your intentions are being a potential mate, I now look at how you handle stress, your spending habits and how you take care of your children if you have them. Its amazing how the lord shows us what we want, what we like and what we need. Its up to us to make a good decision and choose wisely. One quote I took from today's church service. "Change when you need to so you don't have to change when you have to." I'm changing to get to my next level.
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
not much today
It’s been a few weeks since I have posted something and to be honest I haven’t had much motivation lately. I have my moments where something happens and I think to myself “I should blog about that.” But I have not been feeling it. I guess with being busy at work, the holidays and me trying to be a counselor to friends I have put my thoughts on the back burner. Oh well, I will be back as soon a things calm down or I have time to focus on me. *hugs*
Monday, November 29, 2010
Two Sides To Every Story
This weekend I truly realized there are two sides to every story. Without going into to much detail, I realized all the while I was placing blame on someone else their view of the situation was placing blame on me. I was fortunate enough to have an open conversation and let go of my stubbornness to hear it out. I will say its a shock to the system to hear the truth about yourself especially when you feel like your always right.
May sound funny but the blame was evenly placed, and both of us took responsibility for our actions. I can sincerely say I am at piece with the situation and hope to have learned a valuable lesson from all of this.
May sound funny but the blame was evenly placed, and both of us took responsibility for our actions. I can sincerely say I am at piece with the situation and hope to have learned a valuable lesson from all of this.
Update
November is coming to a close and I did my 30 days of the on-line dating thing. I wish there was a more interesting story to tell you but it isn't. I lost interest right after I posted the I gotta date blog. It wasn't as fun as I thought and it was more work than anticipated. I was better off meeting someone in the grocery store looking for produce. I'm glad I gave it a try and I can honestly say I tried but It's not for me. To all of you all that chose to look for love via social networking, websites and dating chat rooms, I wish you much luck.
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Emotional Rehab
(Before you read this please remember this blog is my therapy. Sometimes I share personal parts of my life because it helps to get things out instead of keeping it bottled up. I'm an artist and I'm sensitive about my sh*t)
Some things I just don't understand when it comes to men, dating, sex, feelings, and relationships. What the heck is going on??? I ask myself that question on multiple occasions. Many of us women have the same story and it all ends up with heartache or pain of some sort. Very few of us find that happy place and get the good man that's going to love and be a devoted.
Around this time last year I wrote a blog titled "All Men Lie, Most Men Cheat, I Still Haven't Found One To Prove Me Wrong" After experiencing the situation I discussed in that article, I decided to go hard core and treat the men how they treated me. Now for a woman to do that is hard because no matter what, we still somehow develop feelings. So to avoid catching feelings I would disconnect myself before anything had the chance to develop.
This went on for a few months until I met this one guy who I can honestly say stole my heart. It wasn't suppose to be that way and I had no intentions with him to begin with but he saw through my exterior gained my trust and broke down some walls, layer by layer he was getting closer to me in ways I didn't think were possible.
Everything seemed to be good. No pressure, public outings, great communication. Then all of a sudden everything came to a halt. Without warning, the communication stopped....
WTF!!! is all I could think. how in the world do you know what I've gone through emotionally in the past and the types of dealings I've had with trusting men and you pull something like this....Oh hell naw!
Part of me wanted so bad to let out the inner stalker and slash tires, key cars, call up his job and some more things. But after the initial shock, bucket of tears and the hurt I came to realize he was unavailable.
I would love for him to answer my questions and tell me why he went about things in the manner that he did but its not my place to wonder anymore.
I prayed on it and instead of me wishing harm I wished for peace. And if he couldn't find happiness with me then he finds happiness with himself. I'll let GOD handle this and i know I'll have my answer when the time is right.
So back to starting over, my walls are thicker than ever and I'm going through an EMOTIONAL REHAB.
Some things I just don't understand when it comes to men, dating, sex, feelings, and relationships. What the heck is going on??? I ask myself that question on multiple occasions. Many of us women have the same story and it all ends up with heartache or pain of some sort. Very few of us find that happy place and get the good man that's going to love and be a devoted.
Around this time last year I wrote a blog titled "All Men Lie, Most Men Cheat, I Still Haven't Found One To Prove Me Wrong" After experiencing the situation I discussed in that article, I decided to go hard core and treat the men how they treated me. Now for a woman to do that is hard because no matter what, we still somehow develop feelings. So to avoid catching feelings I would disconnect myself before anything had the chance to develop.
This went on for a few months until I met this one guy who I can honestly say stole my heart. It wasn't suppose to be that way and I had no intentions with him to begin with but he saw through my exterior gained my trust and broke down some walls, layer by layer he was getting closer to me in ways I didn't think were possible.
Everything seemed to be good. No pressure, public outings, great communication. Then all of a sudden everything came to a halt. Without warning, the communication stopped....
WTF!!! is all I could think. how in the world do you know what I've gone through emotionally in the past and the types of dealings I've had with trusting men and you pull something like this....Oh hell naw!
Part of me wanted so bad to let out the inner stalker and slash tires, key cars, call up his job and some more things. But after the initial shock, bucket of tears and the hurt I came to realize he was unavailable.
I would love for him to answer my questions and tell me why he went about things in the manner that he did but its not my place to wonder anymore.
I prayed on it and instead of me wishing harm I wished for peace. And if he couldn't find happiness with me then he finds happiness with himself. I'll let GOD handle this and i know I'll have my answer when the time is right.
So back to starting over, my walls are thicker than ever and I'm going through an EMOTIONAL REHAB.
If you expect it then say it
One huge source of conflict in a relationship with your spouse, boyfriend, or girlfriend are expectations. These are things that you would hope that the other person would do in the context of your friendship and partnership. When these expectations aren't met, there is conflict. Most conflicts revolve around one source of unmet expectations or another. This is why you need to avoid this trap as much as possible.
If you get into a pattern early on in a relationship, you are probably going to be expected to keep it. If you have been writing sweet notes, for example, every Friday then forget about it for more than a month, your partner might wonder what he or she did to make you not want to do it anymore. There can be hurt feelings involved in something like a change in patterns.
Be clear about what you want and need in the relationship. It's best to do this as early as possible. If you need so many hours a week of time alone, put those patterns into place early and not later when there could be conflict because of it. Find out what your partner's expectations are in a relationship to see if you both can realistically meet them.
Be clear about what you don't want or don't need. If you draw healthy boundaries, you can protect your interests while not feeling you are stepping on what is expected of you. Be firm but loving when doing this. Again, the earlier this is done the better.
Talk about expectations in terms of different levels of commitment. Sometimes one partner or the other might expect you to act a certain way once engaged or once married. Talk about what you both think you expect at these deeper levels of commitment to avoid disappointment later on in your relationship.
(These are not my word but I agree completely. Its along the lines of what I wanted to say however found them in an article someplace on line. This is what we call the expectation trap. so many of us fall into it and don't understand what happened when things go south.)
If you get into a pattern early on in a relationship, you are probably going to be expected to keep it. If you have been writing sweet notes, for example, every Friday then forget about it for more than a month, your partner might wonder what he or she did to make you not want to do it anymore. There can be hurt feelings involved in something like a change in patterns.
Be clear about what you want and need in the relationship. It's best to do this as early as possible. If you need so many hours a week of time alone, put those patterns into place early and not later when there could be conflict because of it. Find out what your partner's expectations are in a relationship to see if you both can realistically meet them.
Be clear about what you don't want or don't need. If you draw healthy boundaries, you can protect your interests while not feeling you are stepping on what is expected of you. Be firm but loving when doing this. Again, the earlier this is done the better.
Talk about expectations in terms of different levels of commitment. Sometimes one partner or the other might expect you to act a certain way once engaged or once married. Talk about what you both think you expect at these deeper levels of commitment to avoid disappointment later on in your relationship.
(These are not my word but I agree completely. Its along the lines of what I wanted to say however found them in an article someplace on line. This is what we call the expectation trap. so many of us fall into it and don't understand what happened when things go south.)
Monday, November 8, 2010
"My Church Boyfriend"
This piece was going to be a little joke about this guy that I think purposely sits next to me at Church. At first I didn't think anything of it but when the 3rd Sunday came and he sat right next to me I noticed he was looking forward for me to be there. He tells me when he has to leave before service is over and he got a little upset when someone sat between us. I got a Church Boyfriend yall! LOL
On a serious note this is how I have been feeling, so I turned it around from an individual meaning to a spiritual meaning.... Enjoy.
Waking up Sunday morning excited, doesn't matter how late I got in the night before I make sure I'm up and ready for our 9:00am date. I make sure to put on my best for him. Hair done, makeup on, and just the right outfit. We've had this same appointment for sometime now but I always get excited. He always tells me to come as I am no need to get all dressed up. He doesn't care how I look on the outside because he knows my heart,he sees me for who I am.
Soon as I walk through the door his warmth fills me up. My eyes start to water with happiness and joy. I'm so glad to be in his presence. Those around me feel my joy and embrace me. I never felt love like this before, it's amazing.
No mater what I'm going through, how I feel, or who I feel is against me. When I talk to him he takes all of the pain and confusion away.
I love the talks we have, the quiet moments of reflection and the lessons he teaches. There is nobody greater than him. Can't believe it took me this long to give him a chance,to realize how great of a relationship this is. He was waiting for me all this time. Never giving up on me, not pointing the finger at me and he forgave me for all the wrong I've done. He knows I'm a work in progress but he is willing to work with me through it all. This is the unconditional love I've been waiting for. I've got a Church boyfriend yall!
On a serious note this is how I have been feeling, so I turned it around from an individual meaning to a spiritual meaning.... Enjoy.
Waking up Sunday morning excited, doesn't matter how late I got in the night before I make sure I'm up and ready for our 9:00am date. I make sure to put on my best for him. Hair done, makeup on, and just the right outfit. We've had this same appointment for sometime now but I always get excited. He always tells me to come as I am no need to get all dressed up. He doesn't care how I look on the outside because he knows my heart,he sees me for who I am.
Soon as I walk through the door his warmth fills me up. My eyes start to water with happiness and joy. I'm so glad to be in his presence. Those around me feel my joy and embrace me. I never felt love like this before, it's amazing.
No mater what I'm going through, how I feel, or who I feel is against me. When I talk to him he takes all of the pain and confusion away.
I love the talks we have, the quiet moments of reflection and the lessons he teaches. There is nobody greater than him. Can't believe it took me this long to give him a chance,to realize how great of a relationship this is. He was waiting for me all this time. Never giving up on me, not pointing the finger at me and he forgave me for all the wrong I've done. He knows I'm a work in progress but he is willing to work with me through it all. This is the unconditional love I've been waiting for. I've got a Church boyfriend yall!
I Got A Date!
Okay, so this on line dating thing is getting interesting. I have chatted with a few folks and none have really sparked my interest but this one dude seems to be real cool. So after a few days of chatting on the phone we decide to meet up for lunch. I'm not expecting anything and hope that the face to face conversation is just as lively as the phone conversation. We shall see and I'll keep you all updated.
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Shallow or Truth
Sometimes I like to pose questions on my Facebook page to get reactions to some real life scenarios that I know that's going on.
In this one scenario this Guy told his woman while they were dating that he was not attracted to big women, and he would not stay around if she fell outside of the weight range he thought was acceptable for her height. The woman was ok with this because at the time she was a nice size that was pleasing to him. Time goes on, he ask her to to marry him and she says yes.... The guy reminds the woman of his physical preference and again tells her I don't like big women. All you have to do is take care of the house and maintain your weight. I'll Take care of everything else including car notes insurance, mortgage/rent, utilities,groceries and I'll even put some cash in your pocket if needed. The woman again agrees to the terms. She goes to work, takes care of the house and maintains her weight. A few years into the marriage they have a kid, and as we all know having a child will change a woman's body structure. She gains weight he's ok with it due to circumstance but he reminds her of his preference and ask her within 6-12 mos to get back down to size.
Two years go by and the wife is the larges she has ever been with no effort to lose the weight..... So her is the question.....
If before u get married your fiancé tells u he's not attracted to big women and all u have to do is keep the same weight he met u with. Do u get mad if 5yrs down the line he wants to separate because u put on a significant amount of weight?
My facebook friends are the greatest, here are a few of their responses.
-nope...cuz you knew he was shallow when ya got married
-Nope cuz what if I do get big, you are suppose to love me for me, so that means you only married me for my size.. Wow!!! a negative...
-so don't get fat... fat is unhealthy anyways. problem solved. you stayed thin an sexy to get him and once you got him you stop doing what you did to get him. you better continue to do what you were doing to keep him. Women quit showing men your representatives just to get them. (yes this works both ways) Many relationships fail because people forget to put forth the effort you did in the beginning.
-Hell yea u get mad! That's the problem with ppl these days...they don't honor their vows! It says for richer or poorer, sickness and health, in good times and in bad til death do u part... her gaining weight may be that bad time...he is supposed to stick with his wife... that's like leaving him just cause he lost his job! He can find a new job just like she can lose weight!
-there's a big difference between gaining weight and just being lazy and u gain the weight!!! Now if anyone should be mad it should be the man
In this one scenario this Guy told his woman while they were dating that he was not attracted to big women, and he would not stay around if she fell outside of the weight range he thought was acceptable for her height. The woman was ok with this because at the time she was a nice size that was pleasing to him. Time goes on, he ask her to to marry him and she says yes.... The guy reminds the woman of his physical preference and again tells her I don't like big women. All you have to do is take care of the house and maintain your weight. I'll Take care of everything else including car notes insurance, mortgage/rent, utilities,groceries and I'll even put some cash in your pocket if needed. The woman again agrees to the terms. She goes to work, takes care of the house and maintains her weight. A few years into the marriage they have a kid, and as we all know having a child will change a woman's body structure. She gains weight he's ok with it due to circumstance but he reminds her of his preference and ask her within 6-12 mos to get back down to size.
Two years go by and the wife is the larges she has ever been with no effort to lose the weight..... So her is the question.....
If before u get married your fiancé tells u he's not attracted to big women and all u have to do is keep the same weight he met u with. Do u get mad if 5yrs down the line he wants to separate because u put on a significant amount of weight?
My facebook friends are the greatest, here are a few of their responses.
-nope...cuz you knew he was shallow when ya got married
-Nope cuz what if I do get big, you are suppose to love me for me, so that means you only married me for my size.. Wow!!! a negative...
-so don't get fat... fat is unhealthy anyways. problem solved. you stayed thin an sexy to get him and once you got him you stop doing what you did to get him. you better continue to do what you were doing to keep him. Women quit showing men your representatives just to get them. (yes this works both ways) Many relationships fail because people forget to put forth the effort you did in the beginning.
-Hell yea u get mad! That's the problem with ppl these days...they don't honor their vows! It says for richer or poorer, sickness and health, in good times and in bad til death do u part... her gaining weight may be that bad time...he is supposed to stick with his wife... that's like leaving him just cause he lost his job! He can find a new job just like she can lose weight!
-there's a big difference between gaining weight and just being lazy and u gain the weight!!! Now if anyone should be mad it should be the man
On-line dating update
Day 5 of my on line adventure, and let me tell you this is nothing like what I expected. I thought it was going to be like a meat market of desperate guys looking for something other than a relationship. So glad its not that way and if it is I'm not getting the crazies.
Anyway, I received a few communication request during the first day and I sent some request out. I have had a guy who was boring as everything send me these questions that I was not interested in answering at all and a guy who seems cool so far. Its ok but moving very slow.(as it should) It's only day 5.
25 more days to go....
Anyway, I received a few communication request during the first day and I sent some request out. I have had a guy who was boring as everything send me these questions that I was not interested in answering at all and a guy who seems cool so far. Its ok but moving very slow.(as it should) It's only day 5.
25 more days to go....
Friday, October 22, 2010
On-Line Dating, Good or Bad Idea?
Well we’re about to find out… I just signed up to try it out for one month only, starting today 10/22/10. Uploaded a picture and profile and will blog about my experience. I figure since my love life has been so crazy that this could be no worse. My picture is on facebook, this blog, and on twitter, not to mention I’m tagged in a bunch of my friends photos and probably some other pics posted places I’m not even aware of. So the scare of having my face seen on line is out.
I figure this experience will be very interesting and note worthy. So for the next 30 days wish me luck and lets hope for some interesting blogs.
I figure this experience will be very interesting and note worthy. So for the next 30 days wish me luck and lets hope for some interesting blogs.
Monday, October 18, 2010
Happy Birthday To Me!!!
I turned 32 this past Friday and I am loving every moment of it. I had a great time with family and friends and I felt the love from my facebook peeps. For some reason I never paid attention to how good it felt to get a phone call instead of a text on a birthday. I'm use to people texting and messaging all the time it really stood out the few friends that decided to pick up the phone and say a quick hello with well wishes.
I had a great time bowling and hanging out at Dave and Busters. And I also enjoyed my little after party seeing the male entertainers.
Overall a great time.
I had a great time bowling and hanging out at Dave and Busters. And I also enjoyed my little after party seeing the male entertainers.
Overall a great time.
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Ready For Love
India Arie said it best in her poem that was put to music. Love is unpredictable and sometimes one person feels it and the other person doesn't. Sometimes you have the right person but its the wrong time and sometimes the feeling is not love at all.
I am ready for love
Why are you hiding from me
I'd quickly give my freedom
To be held in your captivity
I am ready for love
All of the joy and the pain
And all the time that it takes
Just to stay in your good grace
Lately I've been thinking
Maybe you're not ready for me
Maybe you think I need to learn maturity
They say watch what you ask for
Cause you might receive
But if you ask me tomorrow
I'll say the same thing
I am ready for love
Would you please lend me your ear?
I promise I won't complain
I just need you to acknowledge I am here
If you give me half a chance
I'll prove this to you
I will be patient, kind, faithful and true
To a man who loves music
A man who loves art
Respect's the spirit world
And thinks with his heart
I am ready for love
If you'll take me in your hands
I will learn what you teach
And do the best that I can
I am ready for love
Here with an offering of
My voice
My Eyes
My soul
My mind
Tell me what is enough
To prove I am ready for love
I am ready
I feel every word in those lyrics. Good job India!
I am ready for love
Why are you hiding from me
I'd quickly give my freedom
To be held in your captivity
I am ready for love
All of the joy and the pain
And all the time that it takes
Just to stay in your good grace
Lately I've been thinking
Maybe you're not ready for me
Maybe you think I need to learn maturity
They say watch what you ask for
Cause you might receive
But if you ask me tomorrow
I'll say the same thing
I am ready for love
Would you please lend me your ear?
I promise I won't complain
I just need you to acknowledge I am here
If you give me half a chance
I'll prove this to you
I will be patient, kind, faithful and true
To a man who loves music
A man who loves art
Respect's the spirit world
And thinks with his heart
I am ready for love
If you'll take me in your hands
I will learn what you teach
And do the best that I can
I am ready for love
Here with an offering of
My voice
My Eyes
My soul
My mind
Tell me what is enough
To prove I am ready for love
I am ready
I feel every word in those lyrics. Good job India!
Monday, October 4, 2010
What a day!
How in the world does a simple results appointment turn into an all day event?
I strategically planned an appointment time so that I could make it in time to work a half day today. Well it looks like my Doctor had a different plan. After waiting over an hour in the waiting room to talk for 5 min she told me I need some more stuff done and to go NOW! I felt like I was playing monopoly when they say go to jail do not past go and do not collect 200.00. Geesh, she always gets me when she talks to me like my mother. Lol However I don’t hesitate to listen since the last time she spoke with urgency she saved my life.
Six months ago she advised for me to go to the hospital right after a visit with her. She told me to not go home and to get someone to meet me there. Turns out I was just hours away from a drastic event that could have taken my life. I spent 3 days in the hospital and a month off from work. So glad she knows her stuff cause to the inexperienced doctor they may not have noticed the urgency like she did. I thank the lord for her knowledge and concern.
I strategically planned an appointment time so that I could make it in time to work a half day today. Well it looks like my Doctor had a different plan. After waiting over an hour in the waiting room to talk for 5 min she told me I need some more stuff done and to go NOW! I felt like I was playing monopoly when they say go to jail do not past go and do not collect 200.00. Geesh, she always gets me when she talks to me like my mother. Lol However I don’t hesitate to listen since the last time she spoke with urgency she saved my life.
Six months ago she advised for me to go to the hospital right after a visit with her. She told me to not go home and to get someone to meet me there. Turns out I was just hours away from a drastic event that could have taken my life. I spent 3 days in the hospital and a month off from work. So glad she knows her stuff cause to the inexperienced doctor they may not have noticed the urgency like she did. I thank the lord for her knowledge and concern.
just thinking...
I have noticed some patterns and similarities in the situations I have come across. And since I’m on my journey of finding self I realize it may not be a problem with the men but a problem within me.
I was reading some random quotes and one of them said,
Just as we cannot see our own faces without looking into a mirror, we cannot know ourselves without looking at our relationships.
How true do you think that statement is? I thought about it and for me it makes sense. The relationships I enter into may not work because I’m seeing too much of myself in them and I’m running from the truth about me. It seems I’m looking at someone else to fill a void, and make everything better instead of searching for happiness inside of me. This would be why usually for the first six months of any new friendship I establish it’s all good until the truth starts to come out.
Going forward I’m learning not to run, I’m facing my fears and doing my best not to place blame on someone else for me not being happy.
It’s going to take a special person to see it, deal with it, and love me enough to not run when I get emotional.
I was reading some random quotes and one of them said,
Just as we cannot see our own faces without looking into a mirror, we cannot know ourselves without looking at our relationships.
How true do you think that statement is? I thought about it and for me it makes sense. The relationships I enter into may not work because I’m seeing too much of myself in them and I’m running from the truth about me. It seems I’m looking at someone else to fill a void, and make everything better instead of searching for happiness inside of me. This would be why usually for the first six months of any new friendship I establish it’s all good until the truth starts to come out.
Going forward I’m learning not to run, I’m facing my fears and doing my best not to place blame on someone else for me not being happy.
It’s going to take a special person to see it, deal with it, and love me enough to not run when I get emotional.
Saturday, September 25, 2010
Growing In Faith
" God, I can't figure this out so I'm going to trust you to give me revelation that will set me free."
Things have been happening in my life lately that I just dont understand how or why. As I grow stronger in my faith I am learning to trust God and not ask why. Boy O Boy is it hard. I am the type of person that likes to be in the know or in control but I am learning and understanding that if everything came to me when i wanted it I wouldnt have an appreciation for it or grow from my experiences.
I asked the Lord to help me grow in in my faith and understand your word.
The spirit lead me to this. Proverbs 3:5,6...5 Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.6 In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.
Thats good stuff right there!
Special Thanks to Joyce Meyer Ministries who helped break it down for me.
Things have been happening in my life lately that I just dont understand how or why. As I grow stronger in my faith I am learning to trust God and not ask why. Boy O Boy is it hard. I am the type of person that likes to be in the know or in control but I am learning and understanding that if everything came to me when i wanted it I wouldnt have an appreciation for it or grow from my experiences.
I asked the Lord to help me grow in in my faith and understand your word.
The spirit lead me to this. Proverbs 3:5,6...5 Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.6 In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.
Thats good stuff right there!
Special Thanks to Joyce Meyer Ministries who helped break it down for me.
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Transition Update
So I've been working on self lately and finding out my likes, dislikes, and focusing on family. Through this time as I focus on me I have noticed I've distanced myself from some and become closer to others. I have gone back to reading and developing myself spiritually along with realizing what "I" want instead of trying to make others happy. I learned the word "NO" and how to let people know that my time is valuable.
I will no longer let people drain me emotionally and ask my opinion if they really don't want the answer.
I also learned that I was connected to pieces of my past that was holding me back from my future. Its amazing how things happen but I'm gad I was able to realize I needed to toss out the baggage.
I also have some special shout outs to the folks that helped me realize I was stuck and how to move forward in my journey. I am not where I want to be just yet but I see the movement and I am pleased.
I will no longer let people drain me emotionally and ask my opinion if they really don't want the answer.
I also learned that I was connected to pieces of my past that was holding me back from my future. Its amazing how things happen but I'm gad I was able to realize I needed to toss out the baggage.
I also have some special shout outs to the folks that helped me realize I was stuck and how to move forward in my journey. I am not where I want to be just yet but I see the movement and I am pleased.
Sunday, July 4, 2010
JULY 4TH
HAPPY INDEPENDANCE DAY!
SINCE IT'S INDEPENDENCE DAY I AM CHOSING TO CELEBRATE MY FREEDOM BY TAKING A BREAK FROM BLOGGING. I HAVE LOST MYSELF IN SOME WAY AND NEED TO FOCUS ON ME!
GETTING BACK ON THE GRIND WITH WORK, FAMILY AND RELATIONSHIPS.
IM DONE PLAYING AROUND, LOOKING FOR A SERIOUS RELATIONSHIP THAT WILL LEAD TO MARRIAGE. AND FOCUS ON MAKING MONEY TO SUPPORT MYSELF AND FAMILY.
WISH ME LUCK FAM AND I WILL BE BACK WITH UPDATES PERIODICALY. TALK TO YOU AGAIN IN 3 MONTHS.
*HUGS AND KISSES*
~SECRET~
SINCE IT'S INDEPENDENCE DAY I AM CHOSING TO CELEBRATE MY FREEDOM BY TAKING A BREAK FROM BLOGGING. I HAVE LOST MYSELF IN SOME WAY AND NEED TO FOCUS ON ME!
GETTING BACK ON THE GRIND WITH WORK, FAMILY AND RELATIONSHIPS.
IM DONE PLAYING AROUND, LOOKING FOR A SERIOUS RELATIONSHIP THAT WILL LEAD TO MARRIAGE. AND FOCUS ON MAKING MONEY TO SUPPORT MYSELF AND FAMILY.
WISH ME LUCK FAM AND I WILL BE BACK WITH UPDATES PERIODICALY. TALK TO YOU AGAIN IN 3 MONTHS.
*HUGS AND KISSES*
~SECRET~
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